Listen

By: Bobin Park

“To varying degrees, we all wear masks. We are conditioned to hide our true selves, out of fear of being rejected and/or judged. We are taught to devalue or ignore our pain, as if its utility is better served hidden than exposed.” - Mykee Fowlin 

We all have different meanings behind our self identities. But what about we do to another person? What do our actions say about someone else’s differences? 

Today, now more than ever, we live in a divided society. We are in a constant fight, fights no one else knows about. Fights with racial discrimination, depression, and more. How do we determine what we “need” to do in contrast to what we are “supposed” to do? 

Dr. Michael Fowlin, asked the same questions to a computer screen, staring at his zoom webcam. Throughout his performance, he weaved through different characters, different identities; a straight-A African American gay football player, a six-year old with ADD, a bi-racial feminist, and many more. 

He confronted many powerful questions about prejudice, self-doubt, anxiety, discrimination, inequality, violence through skillfully handled laughter and silence. This performance hit home with most of the people in the audience: teenagers. 

As a person, as the youth, Mykee urged them that they had so much potential. He discussed the effect of our actions, or the absence of our actions. The two words “Be Kind” is something everyone is familiar with. Ever since our parents, teachers, friends, or sometimes, babysitters started telling us this idea, we sometimes wonder what “being kind” actually does to others. 

It stays with them. It can either be remembered or forgotten but both are just as valuable. It can be a miracle to the other person or they might just pass right by it. But it doesn’t deny the fact that giving help, offering to listen, staying with people, all of these, are a reflection of what you think of other people. We revolve around our ideas of the way we see each other. Sometimes, it could be based on bias, sometimes, it could be based on dissimulation, sometimes, it could be based on the person’s actual character. 

But rarely do we get to see someone’s actual character. While we interact with the people we meet, it is quite rare for a person to put down their “mask.” And not just the blue fabric one. I’m talking about the concealment of our identities. 

You may have friends whom you spent your entire lives with, family who’ve never left your side. You imagine the people around you to know who you are, yet sometimes, that idea seems alienated to you. When you feel that no one understands you, you are not looking for a person who will tell you what’s wrong, you are looking for a person who will listen. 

The majority of human activity, excluding actual physical work, is through talking. Naturally, we all love to voice our opinions, to say what we like or don’t like, to talk about what to eat for dinner, to brag about the new house your parents got you. These conversations are evidence that shows just how much humans need to let out their thoughts or feelings. And, perhaps, the hardest human activity would be to not talk. Our primary thoughts are about talking, not about listening. That is why a good listener is so scarce yet so wanted in our world.